December 07, 2007
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Dear brain, please wait for this heart to catch up with you. you are trying & speeding way too fast that the heart cant seem to follow.
The brain is speeding too fast, that it doesn't want to make a step back at all. You need to catch up, heart.
The pace of life is getting faster & slower at the same time. From the outer surface, it definitely is, with all the projects assignments etc which I wouldnt want to go blabbering more about it.
what I know is, you need to depend on yourselves. through all these times, i'm glad i've grown to be more independent.
Silence from the emptiness seems to be the only noise which welcomes me back home every time I lift open the door. The constant home alone nights in my little room with my desktop & music as my best friend somewhat became a routine to me as i try to rush my stuffs & aim to sleep early which i obviously fail every time.
As much as I stand strong, Sometimes, being alone will somehow becomes a definition of lonely & creep slowly but so sharp that it cuts thru your heart.
What could make it worse is when fucking things happen & those things make you feel so lousy and down & your mind allow those thoughts to run & wander off so much so it breaks you.
& on the outsideI tend to put on a constipated smile & pretend everything is alright.
People often ask me, " why don't you like to stay at home? I wanted to so much but I don't have the time!" This is the reason.
Fyi, I'm not a saddist, a emo queen or whatever u call it, i don't feel sad all the time.
" You maybe alone, but you're never lonely because I'm with you all the time."
He spoke to me. |
ranted by faith
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12:53:00 AM comments
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